A formal complaint

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Jager 602
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Joined: Sun Oct 12, 2014 1:41 am

A formal complaint

Post by Jager 602 » Tue Dec 27, 2016 9:08 am

From: Captain/Masterchief/Colonel/Sulat-Aman Jager 602
To: Dewey Chiit'moll, CEO Lottobhad Parts Distributors, a subsidiary of Bairly Werx Mech Manufacturing Corporation

Dear Sir, let me be blunt; I am writing with a complaint. I have purchased numerous parts in your Dreamware(tm) Mech Line and, to date, have been sorely disappointed. I was assured your award-winning Findemfast(tm) and Killemgood(tm) technologies were just the edge I needed in the Mechtown arenas. Unfortunately, this has not been the case.

Using your products, I have lost nearly two-thirds of my engagements- which would be acceptable in the short run, given the many vagaries of combat, fog-of-war, etc. However, when engaged, the targetting system failed to strike legitimate targets almost half the time and utterly failed to fire at the most crucial times. Your AI seemed unable to detect mechs standing in front of them or avoid walls, lampposts, or manhole covers, yet was able, with almost uncannary accuracy, to find and wipe out every billboard in the arena, so long as a current or former celebrity graced it. I have no complaints about your Notsofast Armour packs, but being forced to watch opposing mechs take more time pounding mine to scrap was, all in all, little consolation. In short, the mechs I purchased did not find anything fast or kill anything good.

I hope I am wrong- I intend to use the parts remaining in the hopes that perhaps a winning mech will rise from the ashes. However, if you do not address the issues with your mechs, I will look into the product line of Ahl-Mohs T'Guhd Mechs, Inc., your competitor across the street, and their prize-winning Findemgood(tm) and Killemfast(tm) systems. I look forward to your response.

Sincerely,

Jager 602


A plaque on both your horses.

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MrJoozz
Posts: 30
Joined: Sun Apr 26, 2015 12:52 pm

Re: A formal complaint

Post by MrJoozz » Fri Jan 20, 2017 8:06 pm

Hilarious!
:lol:

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